Thursday, 8 July 2010

No Good (Black) Men

Everyone says it/has said it/will say it.
For women reading this that don't 'date' Black men, That's fine the post applies to all men but I've made the title as it is because it is something that a lot of women who 'date' Black men say.

Here Goes Nothing...

  • The man who calls out to you on the street. (Even if he says excuse me... that just makes him a wasteman with manners)
  • The man who moves to you in the rave. (If you didn't now yet men go raving to find mash and dashes, post on that soon)
  • The man who watches your frame Harrrrrrrrrrd and makes comments like 'You're sexy/hot/chung/peng/' or 'Wow you have a nice...insert body part here
  • The man who says you're beautiful when he barely knows you. (He will then proceed to say this so much you want to find a dictionary and permanently remove 'beautiful' from it)
Why are these bad things though??

Because a man who calls out to you on the road doesn't know you. Anyone who had a even a half good upbringing got told by their parents-
'Do NOT speak to strangers'
So why is he hailing you on the street like you and him are big friends? Because he can tell by the way you walk that you are intelligent...?
Errrrrm no love it's because you have a nice bum... never noticed that some men call to you when they haven't even seen your face...?

As for the ones approaching you in a rave, they went to the rave so they could find someone like you (female of at least average attractiveness)
To do something with. They don't care if you seem 'hard to get' because they know that a lot of females lie so they will persist until you give in.

The last two are the SAME... do not be fooled because one is overtly sexual and the other is 'respectful'. More than likely the second one means the same thing. He just has a little more experience, or maybe you don't seem like a woman that such nonsense would appeal to. 

But why do they always approach me...?!

You ever seen My Wife and Kids? The episode where Micheal and Jay are having counselling, speaking about each others negative attributes and they say 'I can accept that and my heart is still open' Well right now, we are going to have some counselling. And at the end, lets all say...
'I can accept that and my <3 is still OPEN'

Put simply... these men approach you because they CAN...
You make yourself seem available. You walk out in skin tight jeans or leggings. Do you realise how much of your body they expose? Men think this is for them... and frankly it must be because why else are you walking out practically naked?
'Because I like it...'  ¬_¬ then DON'T COMPLAIN
You wear Loooooooooooow cut tops. Your breasts are like airbags because of your new La Senza bra that everyone can see the straps of.
You loud talk. People who loud talk seem talkative and therefore approachable. When you are on the bus l o w e r your voice... no one wants to know about your friends new man anyway.
You have extravagant false hair and nails. These things are superfluous.
You go to the wrooooooooong raves. Any rave where a man and woman are dry sexing on the dance floor is the wrong rave. Refer to my Music post to see what kind of music to expect in a decent persons 'rave' (Although I don't believe there are any... unless it's like an open mic night or something)

Woooooo.... ok it's over

But that is why they approach you. Because your behaviour mirrors that of their counterparts... you are the girl they normally have around them. If you don't want their attention... don't be what they like.

Soooooooo.... what now??
Now you become what you want from a man. You dress to attract the sort of attention you want. Conduct yourself properly. Respect your body and he will respect you.

You're thinking what does this post have to do with the title right...

Moral of the story
There are plenty  good black men. They just avoid YOU like the plague because you are not a good black woman.

Like always I hope I learn from this as much as you. We could all benefit from taking our own advice. And I know it's harsh... but it takes a slap to wake a person when they're in a deep sleep.


  1. This is soo my post on black women. We assume theres nothing wrong with us when there is, ur appearance is what attracts these idiots. No1 walks up 2 u because they wanna be ur freind....its a shame we live in such a world, but yes its true.
    Women in general need 2 conduct themselves with more dignity n respect, myself included.
    Im workin on it


  2. The conclusion/ moral of the story was deep. You weren't playing around with this at all. Kept it real from start to finish